ke bagal-bagal naman ng connection. lintik.

pasko..sana naging maligaya kayo.

evident sa pasko ngayong taon na maraming nagbago sa buhay ko.

simulan na lang sa new neighborhood namin na ni shadow ng christmas spirit eh hindi ata sinapian. by 10pm, lights off na. dinaig pa ang curfew. usually, we spend our christmas eve at pampanga, but it was different this year. we had to stay at home because ewan ko. maselan ata pagbubuntis ng tita ko kaya. basta ganun.

i just sang the night away, sa magic sing namin. inaral ko pa yung isang oldies na kanta sa player ko para ma-perfect ko at mapatotohanan ko ang sabi ni pacquiao na lalo raw gagaling. tapos i rummaged my drawer for a sketchpad..then i discovered something. hahahuhuhaha..something that made my heartbeat race. whatever. basta, evrything ended after the discovery of that something hidden in my things for almost two months. katanga-tanga ko para hindi yun makita.

tapos natulog na ako, mga 4am na yun.

tapos nagising ako ng 12noon.. i was home alone. edi linis linis ng bahay, ligpit ng gamit, kain ng tira-tira tapos nanuod ng DVDs from hannah. in between pala nun eh sinilip ko yung libro ni papa na purpose driven life. na-bother naman niya ako kahit papaano. tapos nagdasal ako. tapos narinig ko na yung busina ng car nmin from outside, dumating na ang pamilya. tapos kain. tapos tulog.

that was merry christmas for me.

paggising ko na lang kanina, naka-confine na daw ang 2 kong tita sa father side. yung isa, nagnervous breakdown daw. may bad encounter ata with her spouse then she said to her daughter: ayoko na dito, aalis na ako! then she fainted. when she became conscious once again, she can't recognize anyone. all that she's saying was: "teka nagmamadali ako. aalis ako. iiwanan na ako ng kasama ko..."

woah.

my other tita was the one who tried to fix the hospital stuffs for her. after everything was alright, she felt something wrong with her stomach. now she's confined too. kaya i spent my day looking after her.

sana wala nang iba pang ma-harm ngaun christmas season. kaya kayo, mag-iingat. yan ang sinasabi ng mabait kong side. sabi nung lunatic na side: aba, sabi ko na nga ba, when all else fail, i always count on lunacy. it's the most accessible escape talaga.